Things I learned from having a painful clit this year
I wasted a lot of time feeling shame for my clit experiencing pain. I made myself wrong because I thought I shouldn’t experience anymore pain because I’ve spent so many years healing and doing different s/ex practices. I also catastrophised and became despondent, believing that I was stuck with this discomfort for life and that there was nothing I could do to change it. Basically I went into many of my negative patterns in the face of this experience. And once I stepped out of these, I was able to do practices that helped the energy shift. So I learned (again) that time spent in a negative down spiral of shame and fear achieves nothing except to keep me stuck.
I learned that pain is often trapped energy that’s looking for attention to allow it to move. When I brought attention and curiosity to my clit, it often shared with me experiences that it didn’t like, that brought stress to the area. And when I stayed open and let these memories and the attendant sensations move through me, the area eased up and the tension and discomfort dissolved.
What I labelled as pain, was often just high sensation, and that when I stayed open and curious to it, the pain shifted into pleasure
My clit and p/ussy open and soften when I’m totally honest about how I want to be touched. I had a habit of holding back or asking for half of what I wanted but this approach kept me stuck, it’s when I was totally honest with my partner that I experienced deep healing in our s/ex too
I learned how much my labia love being touched. With my clit feeling super sensitive much of the time, my labia ended up receiving lots of attention and I felt pleasure and climaxes there I had never experienced before
That my partner is committed to me and our s/ex through tricky spots.
If you’re someone who wants support in your s/ex, relationships and creating the life you desire, I work with people 1on1 and I also have a membership for women called Bean Dána/ Bold Woman. It’s for women who want to carve their own path in life.
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