3 Tips to Turn on your Relationship
I’m pretty sure we all desire more turned on, connected relationships. I certainly do! I’ve devoted my life to studying them so that I experience them for myself and then have the joy of sharing what I know with others.
Today I’ve compiled three tips for turning on your relationship, and the great thing about them is that they don’t require any expensive lingerie or s/ex toys. They just require your attention and your willingness to lean into your relationship. I’ve found them to be really useful, I hope you do too X
Tell the Truth. There is no faster way to kill the eros in your connection, than to hide the truth from your partner. If you have desires you’re not sharing or grievances around how they are showing up, or not showing up that you’re hiding, I can guarantee you that this is killing the electricity between you. Truth is verbal o/rgasm. When you speak the truth, there’s a vibrancy and a juicy aliveness available to you. When you hide your truth, everything becomes dull. Because you’re holding parts of yourself back. It robs your partner of the chance of becoming intimate with ALL of you. Instead what you’re doing is sharing a curated, smaller version of yourself. And when you do that, you become smaller and also often tend to blame your partner for not being able to handle you, even though you haven’t given them the chance!
Annnd before you beat yourself up about this, know that it’s totally normal and most of us do it! There’s no real relationship training in society on how to be honest. Most of us were modelled relationships where honesty wasn’t often on the menu. So if that’s you, go gently, test yourself with a small truth and go from there. Instead of leaping into the big scary ones straight away.
Put Attention on your Partner. Our brains are so lazy. What they love to do, is to take a snapshot or create an avatar of someone and rely on that as guidance for how we feel about them. It’s a way more efficient use of our brain’s energy but a bad recipe for turn on. The way to counteract this, is to put attention on your partner. Like really look at them. Notice what they’re doing. How they look. How your body feels around them. What you’ll remember and feel is how much you like them. How much they turn you on.
Appreciate your Partner. When we spend a lot of time with someone it’s very easy to get caught up on the things they do that are annoying. The way they pick their teeth or leave their muddy boots in the hallway. And if we get stuck in that rut, it’s hard to feel turned on by them. What’s far more potent and creates a virtuous circle is to find the things you appreciate about them and tell them! They will feel seen and appreciated, you will have the glow of saying nice things that please your partner and they will feel more inspired to continue doing nice things for you. Win-win! This environment of appreciation creates warm, loving connection between you and more inspiration for eros too.
How did these land for you? Are you excited to try them out? Email me and let me know. Also reach out if you have any questions and feel free to forward them on these tips to any friends who could use the inspiration too
All my love,
Caoi X
P.S If you want support to turn on your relationship, your s/ex and your life there are two ways of working with me..
🔥 I coach women & men 1on1 in a 6 month’s container that’s curated to your specific needs and desires
⚡ I have a membership for women called Bean Dána/ Bold Woman, it’s a hot group for women who want to explore the depths of their desires, their s/ex and their relationships. The women inside of it are having potent insights and shifts and you can too 🧨
To learn more about these visit my website here and book a call with me to apply here. Or just respond to this email and we’ll take it from there X
